Lisa's story

I had been told getting pg might be hard for me i have several health problems including poly cystic ovarian syndrome (pcos). I was not trying to get pg when it happened in july 2005. I did not know until 5 weeks i had been late but didnt think pg could be the reason. I was getting morning sickness and after awhile gave in and took at test. I took 3 in total thinking they all had to be wrong. I was not using anything but my husband and i did not think we could get pg without the help of other drugs.We had never even had a pg scare all the years we had been together. I was put on avandia shortly before the pg and we both think this diabetes medicine was the reason, it has since been used for fertility purposes. I called my dr. and went off all of my meds that might harm the baby. I went to the dr. at 8 weeks and did the labs they require everything was fine. I was put on insulin shots instead of pills for the benifit of the baby. We thought everything was going okay. I had not had any problems such as spotting or cramping and felt beside morning sickness pretty good. I did not think anything of a tiny watery swipe ofblood in late sept. just one and tiny. I didnt even think to metion it to my husband. I started having the shakes at night i would freeze and then burn-up with a cold sweat my teeth even chattered but did not know till later it could have been a sign of hormone changes. We still thought everything was fine. I went to the dr. for my first ultrasound on oct.4th i was scared, but felt okay about it. I was seeing a maternal/fetal specialst due to my health situation. The dr. had already done all of the "yearly visit" type things and was getting ready to do the internal ultrasound i had an overwhelming feeling something was wrong with the baby, i told the nurse with me she said all mothers are nervous. The dr. and i where looking at the screen but he turned it from me quickly and i knew something had to be wrong he took a couple measurements then turned the screen to me and told me the baby had died , there was no heart beat. He called it fetal demise. I asked for some pictures. I was in complete shock and very sad. i broke into tears and blamed myself maybe i had done something to cause this. I felt my body had betrayed me. I thought that was it the only chance i would have to be a mom and it was gone i couldnt believe it . Then he told me of my options i choose to try to have the miscarriage naturally. Which i did on the the 10th. I will put the story of that in another email if that is of interest to you.

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I found out i was 5 weeks pg in august a very big suprise blessing.I had some nausea for a couple days so i finally broke down and took at pg test it was +. Then i took another and another in disbelief they to were +. I called my primary dr. and went of all meds that could harm the baby. I had been told all my life it would be hard for me to get pg. My husband and i have been together for several years and had not even one scare until last july when i became pg but we now know it was do to a drug i was taking for diabetes called avandia . I was only on it a couple weeks when i got pg they now use it for fertility issues. We had no idea of this side effect. We do not use anthing because we thought i could not get pg without medical help. suprise we where in complete shock but very happy. I went to the dr. for blood tests and everything seemed fine. I went back at 10 1/2 weeks for an ultrasound and check up. I had a transvaginal
one. I had a bad feeling and told the nurse in the room with me but she told me all moms are nervous.The dr i was seeing was a maternal fetal specialist due to the fact i have pcos one of the reasons i dont think i could get pg without the medicine and i have high blood pressure and diabetes. He had already finished the checkup part and then went to do the ultrasound his facial expression changed and he turned the screen from me and i knew my thoughts where true something was wrong. There was no heart beat and i could see the screen and could tell. He told me the baby had stopped growing maybe 10 + days. I was very upset and cried and cried i thought my body had betraded me . I felt like i had worked so hard to do the best i could for this baby but had not done enough it had died anyway. I was told that i could have it naturally or have pills to help me cramp or have a d&c i wanted to let my body do what was natural if i could. I felt that this way i could have my baby a couple more days as long as it was inside me it was safe kind of like suspended animation. Everything was fine. This all happened on the 4th of oct. my baby came on the 10th after hours of cramps . I had no bleeding or pain until the 10th at around 11 or so i felt alot of pressure and pain very strong pains. I laid down and after a 1/2 hour got up to go to the rest room i felt like someone had laid a bowling bowl on my cervix. I got into the bathroom door and exploded no one had told me how painful or quick it happened i was very unprepared. The amnotic fluid was everywhere but no blood yet then it came like a river it sounded like i had turned on a faucet. my husband had to go to the store to get more pads and things just 5 min away but when he came home i had passed out over the end of the bed i do not remember that but remember him making me go to the hospital they where not very compassionate and i had an intern who was rough and had to go in to get the placenta out it was stuck in my cervix. I had iv fluids and was given pads and was told i had had a misscarriage. I had to go to my dr a week later an get rhogam and see if everything had came out.I never got to see my baby but was very suprised how developed yours was maybe you were farther along but like you said you know when you got pg then you know.! i really wish i had gotten to see my it bothers me i want to know if it was a boy or girl. i would feel like it was more real i guess. We did not tell everyone so it feels like a dirty little secret we had planned to wait till that ultrasound but when we got the bad news just kept it to close family and friends. All of those already knew. I have made a memory box with angelbaby's things inside pictures from the ultrasound and such and it has helped me heal. We have not tried to get pregnat again. We plann on trying to have a baby in spring 08. We have discussed it and plann on trying one more time and if i have a misscarriage we will not try again 2 is enough. If you wouldnt mind to tell me how it all unfolded for you it might be a good comparison i also have not met anyone who did it naturally. D&c's seem to be the way most handle it. I have talked to some women and read some books that most cant stand to have a dead baby inside them it did not bother me it was where it was supposed to be safe under my heart. The book doesnt do details and i understand why so if you want to share please do and if not i understand. lisa ~